Chill Pills
Me-Time 101: Self-care in the time of Covid (4 of 11)
Welcome back!
How has your week been? Did you manage to find even a minute of me-time? Have you found ways to spend some time on yourself to create or maintain life balance? Are you establishing any new, healthy habits or reviving old ones?
Wherever you are on your journey, it is good to pause and remember to take care of yourself. For me the week’s me-time consisted of reading some each day, swimming once, walking in the beautiful wintry woods on the warmest day of the week, doing a bit of yoga and qigong, and watching a documentary about Thich Nhat Hanh’s community of Zen Buddhist monks and nuns called Walk with Me (available for rent or purchase on Netflix).
It isn’t hard to recognize that life during Covid means stress and anxiety are readily available. In some ways it feels like we are actually swimming in it! So, this week I would like to share a few simple self-care options that are flexible enough to take as little as one minute or as much as 30 minutes, depending on the time you have to give. In “Just Breathe,” I covered the benefits of breathing from the diaphragm and offered simple breathing meditations to calm yourself and become more centered. Are these becoming habits yet? Keep practicing. Now let’s add a few more tools to the toolbox.
Mindful Eating
I was on a spiritual retreat some years ago where we practiced mindful eating. It was during this retreat while sitting silently at a table of six fellow retreat-goers and eating a vegetarian meal prepared by the Christian nuns that I realized something profound about eating. Of the five senses, the sense of taste is the only one we choose to engage. Generally we see, hear, feel, and smell all sorts of things whether we wish to or not. But we choose to eat. We choose to put something into our mouths which will have particular tastes and textures. It seems to reason, then, that we should absolutely relish and enjoy eating.
Unfortunately, we do much of our eating so unconsciously that we may barely taste the food we have chosen to eat.
Realistically, if you aren’t in the habit of mindful eating, you might find that you can’t sustain it for very long. That is fine. Commit to the first three bites of each meal as mindful moments.
This is where mindful eating comes in. To mindfully, or consciously eat, means simply to place your attention on the food itself - the smell of it, the texture in the mouth, the flavors. As you take a bite, take the time to chew slowly and to recognize everything you can about the experience of eating. What does it feel like, taste like, smell like? How does it make you feel? How does it feel going down your throat and into your stomach? At what point do you feel satisfied or full? You may decide to close your eyes as you do this.
Realistically, if you aren’t in the habit of mindful eating, you might find that you can’t sustain it for very long. That is fine. Commit to the first three bites of each meal as mindful moments. Remember, we do this so that we can center ourselves and place attention in the body. By doing this you are quieting the overactive mind and keeping stressors in check.
If you have never tried this before, I suggest beginning with fresh fruit. You might be surprised how amazing a strawberry or raspberry really tastes and smells and feels!
Mindful Eating
Place your attention on the food before you.
As you take each bite, be aware of the textures, flavors, and smells of your food.
Chew slowly.
As you swallow, feel the food make its way to your stomach.
Check in with your emotions as you eat.
Mindfully eat for at least the first three bites of each meal or snack.
Done.
Mindful Walking
Mindful walking can be done anytime you are walking from point A to point B. However, it is best experienced in a peaceful, calm environment and outside in nature. Walking is much like eating and breathing; we do it all the time unconsciously. Walking has its practical purpose - to get us somewhere. Mindful walking serves a different purpose; it is another way to enter the present moment more fully. Mindful walking is another activity that can take as little as one minute or as much as 30 minutes, if you are so disciplined.
I have a lovely memory of my oldest son asking me to practice mindful walking with him when we were at a nice park one summer, where there was a community festival. He had been wanting to try it for several months after a teacher had talked about mindful walking. After we were some distance from the festival, we took off our shoes, placed them under a tree, and headed in opposite directions for about five minutes. I walked slowly, taking baby steps with one foot in front of the other, slowly slowly, moving randomly between and around the trees. I noticed the temperature of the ground, the feel of the grass, rocks, clumps of dirt, and tree roots as I walked. My mind began to quiet, my breathing slowed, and I felt happy and grateful. As I walked I began to realize how the walking itself was metaphorical and symbolic in nature. The sounds of the festival wafted in the background or disrupted my focus, but it was all good. After five minutes or so, my son and I made our way back to the tree, smiled at each other, put on our shoes, and headed home. In the car, we debriefed our experience. Perfect!
Mindful walking
Choose a place you want to practice mindful walking (such as a back yard or nearby park or beach).
Decide how long you will mindfully walk.
If possible, remove your shoes and place your attention on your feet.
Walk slowly, placing one foot in front of the other in baby steps.
Ask yourself: What sensations do I feel? How does my body respond? What are the sounds I hear? How do they affect me? How does my breathing alter? What emotions am I experiencing?
Finish and put on your shoes.
Thank yourself for taking time to practice mindful walking.
How do you feel?
Labyrinth Walking
Labyrinth walking is a variation on mindful walking that uses a labyrinth or maze. You can find labyrinths at retreat centers or some yoga studios. If you have access to a beach, you might be able to make your own temporary labyrinth.
As you walk slowly and mindfully through the labyrinth, think about the sensations you are experiencing. Be open to the thoughts and feelings that come to you. This activity can hold much symbolism, creating profound epiphanies.
Guided Meditation
By now you have likely heard of guided meditation. Have you tried it? Guided meditation is a great way to spend 3, 5, 10 or 20 minutes of me-time. In guided meditation someone else speaks instructions, guiding you step by step through an imagined experience as you sit or lie down. You can expect to feel more present, more calm, and more centered when you are finished. Perhaps you would like to try it this week.
The very first guided meditation I experienced was in high school. The director of the musical led all of the actors through a tense and release exercise. We lay on the stage floor on our backs as he asked us to place our attention on different parts of the body. Each time we instructed us to tense and then release that part of the body until our entire bodies were completely relaxed like noodles. I loved it! Why hadn’t someone done this for me years ago, I wondered. It was the first time I discovered something that could actually release the constant stress and tension I felt in my body.
There are literally thousands of guided meditations available. The key is to find a style and voice that suits you. I happen to enjoy guided meditations by Australian men - there’s just something about that accent. . .
A quick search in Google Play or IPhone Apps will provide plenty of options. In a previous article I have mentioned the apps Headspace and Calm. Here I would like to add Smiling Mind as another great option. This free app is very user friendly and easily caters to your experience, goals and time frame. If you don’t have access to apps, then perhaps search online or on Youtube for guided meditations.
Guided meditation
Find or use a Guided Meditation of your choice.
Sit quietly in a quiet space where you will not be interrupted.
Follow the instructions.
How do you feel?
Before you go
I am so glad you are taking time to take care of yourself. Continue building and expanding your self-care habits by slowly adding tools to your toolbox and/or increasing your total me-time over the coming weeks and months. Remember, breathe, make time, practice.
Feel free to write a note in the comments. How much daily time are you spending on self-care? What do you do to relieve stress or anxiety? What do you do to become centered and calm?
Resources
Bumgardner, Wendy. “Walking a Labyrinth as a Spiritual Exercise.” Verywellfit.com. July 17, 2021.
Smiling Mind: Meditation for all ages. Smiling Mind Pty. Ltd. Ver. 4.10.0, Feb. 2022.
Walk with Me. Directed by Francis, Marc J. and Max Pugh, narration by Benedict Cumberbatch, Walkwithmefilm.com, 2017.
Next up: Nighttime Me-Time
You can find my other series “Parenting 101 Coupons: A Gift from your Parents” and “Partnering 101: A Deep Dive into Leaving Kindly” in the archives.
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Brenda BraykoWriter. Teacher. Gong Player.
Find more of my writing at GreenBaytoKorea.blogspot.com.
Learn about my business at CelestialSoundGB.com